Golfo Magnifico
Forbes, 10/30/06, by David Hochman

On Mexico's Pacific coast, the courses range from the eccentric to the sublime; the experience is espectacular.

With all due respect to Robert Trent Jones, Jr., there's not a fairway architect alive who can match what The Man Upstairs cooked up at El Tamarindo, an 18-hole wonderland midway between Puerto Vallarta and Manzanillo, Mexico.

Consider what happens when I hit a funky slice off the ninth tee. Clink! The ball skips twice on the terraced lawn, sending a hundred blue crabs into disco mode, before--skeeeeew… plunk!--the shot flies Butch Cassidy--style off a soaring cliff into the pounding Pacific surf below. Apparently, even God enjoys a good golf joke.

Myself, I've been smirking ever since I landed at Puerto Vallarta and spotted the over-the-top signage inside the Arrivals area. WELCOME TO THE COSTA ALEGRE, it read. HOME TO THE MOST ESPECTAULAR GOLF IN THE WORLD.

That helpful bit of Spanglish had me onboard the hotel courtesy shuttle by seven the next morning for what I reckoned would be an espectacular start to an espectacular ten-day tour of the region's finest golf and resort destinations. Melissa Chiaro, who used to run Korakia Pensione, the sexiest villa hotel in Palm Springs, now oversees high-end golf tours for Essence of Mexico, and essentially what I craved was to follow her itinerary from tee to tequila bar straight down the shimmering coast.

Of course, Melissa's notes said nada about the resident boa constrictor at my first stop, Vista Vallarta, the only 36-hole layout within three hours of P.V. and one of two golf complexes open to guests at luxe Casa Velas. The slithering garden-hose-hazard makes his home behind the eighth hole on the 7,057-yard Jack Nicklaus signature course, and he's hardly the property's diciest feature. Nicklaus left enough jungle, water and sand to make me feel like Dora the Explorer after swinging through 18. Tom Weiskopf's adjoining course is hairier still, with 6,976 yards curling around tall palm forests, swift creeks and craggy ravines. My best tip: Nearly all the greens break toward the ocean. Of course, you can only see the ocean from about 6 of 36 greens.

The ocean is practically all you see on Nicklaus's gasp-inducing course at the Four Seasons Punta Mita, my next stop. Eight holes hug the vacant shoreline, and another--the one you've drooled over in all the golf calendars--features a natural island green 199 yards out in the Pacific. This being the Four Seasons, the hole, known as the Tail of the Whale, also comes with a ride aboard an amphibious water taxi, where one (well, I) could brave the surf while enjoying a cool towel, Zen insights from a golf pro and, ah, si, a choice Cuban cigar.

Farther south, following the Sierra Madres for several hours, I made like Heidi Klum and Seal's wedding guests and checked into El Careyes Beach Resort--which boasts private plunge pools and splashy Pacific views, before teeing off the next morning at El Tamarindo. It struck me while driving mile after mile upon its hand-hammered stone access road that El Tamarindo might be an okay place to knock around some golf balls. Lo, reader, I was unprepared for the glory. The course, designed by Trent Jones, Jr., and David Fleming, elbows up against the ocean on a 2,000-acre ecological preserve. Hole 8 starts with a blind tee shot and opens straight out to the beach. The 9th, as previously described, is one of the most memorable holes I've ever played. To fully appreciate the view from that cliff-top tee, I had to crawl on my belly to the unguarded edge.

The yacht-y Grand Bay Hotel on the marina at Isla Navidad is another 35 minutes south, and a fine place to play the finishing hole of my sojourn. The 1,200-acre estate has its own 27-hole championship course, designed by Robert von Hagge, that meanders from hillside to beach with a few well-placed lagoons in between. Number 15 is all bunker interrupted by a tiny hole. Number 20 requires a Hail Mary drive from blind back tees that pays off on an open fairway studded with lazy iguanas.

Speaking of payoff, there's nothing quite like a well-stocked tequila bar to offset uno or dos mulligans, and no place along the way did the trick like Antonio's at Grand Bay. In a softly lit alcove near the restaurant's entrance, a tuxedoed barkeep talks you (well, me) through the options from more than 200 varieties of the region's liquid gold. Would it be a glistening shot of joven abocado? Or maybe a slow-going snifter of vintage añejo? Choices, choices--all espectacular, indeed!

For more info, please contact Melissa Chiaro
www.essenceofmexico.com  760-485-7028  melissa@essenceofmexico.com